Today started like any other. Mom took us out to play in the new fenced yard. When we came back in I was limping on my left front leg. I did not want mom to investigate it, as I have big paw issues which have involved injuring nail girls at PetSmart. We won't really speak of that. Or of my conniption fit at the Mutt Strut when I was microchipped. Let's just say that I am a little sensitive about people messing with my body. So instead of getting a lot of sympathy and treats for limping, mom gave Maddie a Greenie and put her in her crate, and she gave me a BATH. Yes, a bath. Not to be confused with a Greenie in any way. She said it always subdues me, not that she has had a lot of experience with baths, given that I have had now exactly 3 since living with her. She's not big into personal hygiene for dogs. I was subjected to that insult, and then she wrapped me in a big towel, with just my paw sticking out, and started to look at it through a lighted magnifying thing with tweezers attached. She had another think coming if she thought she was going near my paw with tweezers. So I writhed around enough to convince her that I was having none of this, but I was also holding my paw up even more, and giving her hurt puppy eyes. She called our Aunt Madeleine, for whom my sister is named, and she came over to assist. Auntie Mad is a no nonsense sort, and she brought this basket thing that she fastened around my muzzle and my neck. What was that about? It was my paw that was hurting, not my muzzle. I tried and tried to shake that thing off, and danced about in a frenzy for a few seconds before they corralled me and bound me up in a towel again. Mind you, Maddie is munching away happily on a Greenie while all of this is happening. Mom held me so tightly I thought I might break in two, while Auntie Mad felt all over my poor paw, and I did not like it one little bit. I thought these people loved me! She probed around my pad, then felt all over the top of my paw, and declared that there was no foreign object, but that she thought I had sprained it. No one asked me, but I could have told them that, and avoided a great deal of catastrophe. They took that metal cage off of me, gave me a baby aspirin, and put ME in MY crate with a Greenie. Finally! Then mom took off for forever, and when she came back she smelled like puppy, although there was none to be seen, thank goodness. We do not need interlopers in our house. I am bounding about like a gay deer as usual now, but I did get another baby aspirin hidden in some peanut butter just in case I have a relapse. Needless to say, we didn't make it to Rock Bottom what with the paw incident and the puppy adoption extravaganza. You might think she would have stayed home if she were so darned concerned about me. Well, anyway, long story short (too late) I'm all better now. Ta Ta. Sydney